You know, we all have an automatic voice in our head that tells us how we feel about ourselves. This part of us is known as our Default Mode Network, or DMN. It turns on and starts running anytime we relax and are not focused on doing something. When we are stressed, what it does is worry all the time, and can get on hyper-mode with its worrying. It can get super intrusive, and it gets harder, and harder, to enjoy our life.
The problem is, when we are stressed, our Default Mode Network thinks that the problem is us. That’s when it’s like a hamster wheel that goes around, and around, and around, and it becomes very, very critical of ourselves. It watches everything we do and analyzes it to prove that we are the problem.
Well, you know, even though our Default Mode Network is deeply shaped by our unconscious contracts that we hold deep within us, it is possible for our DMN to work really well for us. When it is working well, it very easily learns self-warmth, even when this concept may be new to you.
I want to acknowledge too that before we can hold our own emotions, it can be very helpful to find others that are skilled with warmth and care, to hold that space for us. When we can then learn how to turn towards ourselves with warmth, and presence, as we are accompanied, we can integrate the experience of being heard and felt and understood. We discover that we make sense and that others actually have had experiences similar to us, whereas before we thought we were all alone.
So, let me ask you, would you like to be accompanied with warmth? Would you like to meet with others who have had similar experiences as you?